random thoughts floating around in my mind

As we get older, we begin to own who we are. We become more comfortable as we look into the mirror and as we look deeply into another person's eyes.

I am twenty years old. I barely know who I am. But what I do know about myself, I love and appreciate, because I can thank God for the way he designed me.

Do you have the confidence to look into my eyes and tell me what is truly in your heart? No matter how ugly it is. Do you have the backbone to stand up for what you believe? Do you trust me?

I complicate this thing called faith. I think God is so mysterious, yet He stands before me daily.

His soul will be satisfied

"Out of the anguish of his soul he shall see and be satisfied; by his knowledge shall the righteous one, my servant, make many to be accounted righteous, and he shall bear their iniquities." Isaiah 53:10

If you are looking for a love story. Turn to the cross. If you are looking for heroism through sacrifice. Look at the nails in His hands that scream "It is finished!" If you are looking for an answer. Look to Him. Jesus. The one who took every blow from the devil for YOU. Just for you and I. Rest in Him. Pray for faith to believe that He is who He says He is.

MLK

Martin Luther King Jr.: “In that dramatic scene on Calvary’s hill three
men were crucified.We must never forget that all three were crucified
for the same crime—the crime of extremism.Two were extremists for
immorality, and thus fell below their environment. The other, Jesus
Christ, was an extremist for love, truth and goodness."

Not satisfied

Lord, please meet me here in this place of desperation. I am in need of a Savior. I am in need of a resurrection. I am need of life in the place the death in me. I need you. I need you. I need you more than the air I breathe. Nothing else can satisfy my soul the way you do. Nothing gives me peace and joy like you. So why I am trying to hold onto this disatisfaction? Why am I holding on so tightly to this struggle, this circumstance, this depression? Do I love my own pain more than I love your wounds which heal me????

Jesus. Is the answer.

grace and chains

I was dead before
Now I am dead to sin
I am learning how to live
how to be free from chains
chains created by rules and laws that I created
I thought Jesus was a man of Laws
A man who saw things in black and white
I thought He was a harsh man
I did not understand grace
because I never allowed myself to experience it
I thought the day I received His forgiveness
was the day I had to start being perfect
I had to win the prize He set before me, which was everlasting life
But I played by my own rules
Rules which I thought would keep me from falling
Don't do this, don't do that,
don't go here, don't wear that
don't say this, don't feel that
Once again I was dead
dead to grace
alive to religion
impure and defiled religion
finally,
four years after meeting you
I am being crucified and resurrected
a new life in me is being born
Sin is no longer my master
I am no longer living constrained by laws
for I am living by grace, and grace alone.

poetry

faith so uncertain

to be a burden

push fears to the ground.

Be still, hear the sound

me, running

you say, "stay"

But on this day

I keep running

away from unsettling feelings

it's deceiving

heartaches

even though I am receiving

Grace upon grace

I can’t even taste your goodness.

your goodness

flows as a stream in green pastures

Take me away

To a place where I can lay

And feel your peace rush over me

___________________________

how much longer

must I hunger?

I'm longing for the gentlness of your palm against my back

which keeps me from falling back

the sea below is threatening

the waves crashing makes me cry out

"Lord, I'm about to swallow this doubt

i chew it, just to spit it out

help me to choose another route!"

i'm broken and under repair

I cry out for life to be fair

what is fair?

what is fair

these days

seems to be rare

only when i stare

into your eyes

am i near to you & far from lies

your rod and staff they comfort me

like the gentleness of a palm against my back

which keeps me from falling back

the threatening sea

suddenly

looks a lot smaller and dimmer

compared to the glimmer

of hope in Your eyes.

___________________________

my Jesus.

I miss you.

you are near.

yet I feel far.

____________________

hypocritical

skeptical

always asking for a miracle

just ask for a mirror fool

then you'll see the very breath you breath

is a sign that you are mine

my son, my daughter

my miracle

so go, go look

at a mirror, full of my reflection in you

my affection is pure

fully able to cure

any disease which leaves

you disable and unable to stand on anything but my grace alone

am I not sufficient, omniscient?

would you repent, if it meant

that I was truly sent?

By God the father,

to die for your sins?