take this heart of stone and give me a heart of flesh

Been a while since I posted anything.
A lot has occurred and I am changing little by little.
I am being stretched this season.
Everything I once believed was true..is simply not.
I use to believe that I was forever connected to my past mistakes
I believed that Faith only concerns Jesus and I
I believed that homeless people are "less fortunate" than I am.
-I have met people with nothing, yet having everything.
I have met people whose homes are the streets


I have been crying a lot lately.
Any form of brokenness brings me to tears.
I was driving to church today and
I saw a man and woman holding a sign asking for any kind of help.
I had a few apples and oranges in my trunk.
I offered them what I had.
This man was so grateful as he held the fruit in his hands.
He made sure to let me know exactly how many he took.
He was the most honest man I've seen who happened to be in a desperate situation.
His humility and thankfulness brought me to tears.
This man is my teacher.
He is my sermon.
He is my pastor.
He is Jesus on the side of the road...waiting to see if anyone notices Him.
I tried to offer him the rest of the food I had, but he humbly said "no thank you and God bless you".
A man who has less in this world
actually has more faith in his heart.
He understands a side of Jesus I have yet to seen.
He understands Grace and humility.
Will I ever be as lucky as him?
Will I ever taste the real side of Jesus?
Or will I forever be a student to the men and women on the road side who continue to call on Jesus no matter how hopeless life seems...?
I want to learn what it means to need Jesus desperately.
I want to know Jesus intimately.
Will you show me more of who You are?
I know it will take many tears to understand how much we are loved by You.
You are an invisible and ignored Being who loves Your creation more than it loves You.
Forgive me.
Thank you.